Monday Blues

Today I am in mourning. The lone star of Texas got a thorough bashing thanks to the ass whooping Brett Favre and the Minnesota Vikings gave Tony Romo and the Dallas Cowboys. The Defensive front of the Vikings caused Romo to fumble 3 times and sacked him 6 times, ouch.

The final score says it all, Vikings 34/Cowboys 3. I have to give credit where it's due. At age 40, Brett Favre proved he can still get the job done during crunch time. He completed 15/24 passes, threw for 234 yards and 4 touchdowns, and had no interceptions. Now the Vikes are just 1 game away from going to the Super Bowl.

KL Dragons

Sunday evening I went to see my first ABL (Asean Basketball League) game, the KL Dragons verses the Singapore Slingers at the MABA (Malaysian Amateur Basketball Association) Stadium in Kuala Lumpur. It’s an old rustic two tier stadium that pales in comparison to the stadiums used by the NBA (National Basketball Association) in the U.S., but the building has a lot of character and soul.

The KL Dragons are Malaysia’s first professional basketball team, which I barely witnessed by catching the team’s last home game in their maiden 2009/2010 season. For my effort the home squad edged out the visiting Slingers, outscoring the opposition 78 – 71. Burn it up! Consequently, that is the title of the Dragons’ team song.

On this occasion the Dragons gave local fans a lot to cheer about, Malaysians were loud and proud throughout the entire contest. However, the Dragons’ current record is 3 games below 500, 5 wins and 8 losses. With only a few games left in the season, a playoff bid appears dubious. Never the less, the nostalgia of watching Malaysians excited about having their first pro basketball team was fun to see, along with the good team play of the KL Dragons.

Note: To Jamal Brown of the KL Dragons

I read that you are from Baltimore, Maryland which is practically right next door to Silver Spring, Maryland where I lived. Since we are from the same hood, how about hooking a brother up with a jersey?

Blasted on Coffee

Without fail millions of people around the world jump-start their day with a cup of java, because it contains caffeine that stimulates the central nervous system which masks fatigue and increases alertness. The effects of caffeine has prompted some athletes to use caffeine as a legal dietary supplement to enhance sports performance during short and long term endurance events, as well as high intensity intermittent activities.

But a drug with such a potent affect on the central nervous system must be taken with sensible moderation. The Mayo Clinic warns that consuming more than 500 to 600 mg of caffeine per day can lead to:

• Insomnia
• Nervousness
• Restlessness
• Irritability
• Nausea or other gastrointestinal problems
• Fast or irregular heartbeat
• Muscle tremors
• Headaches
• Anxiety

For more information on the effects of caffeine on health and wellness refer to the Mayo Clinic.

Or if you are interested in caffeine as a performance enhancement supplement you can refer to the Shoe Clinic.

*These two sources of information do not necessarily reflect my own professional opinions, and I highly suggest that you seek the advice of a licensed practitioner or dietitian if you have concerns about the ingestion of caffeine.

Hey Redskin Fans, How About Dem Cowboys!

War of The Words

Lately, tongues have been flapping over the botched negotiations to bring Floyd Mayweather Jr. and Manny Pacquiao together in the ring to settle the dispute of who is the best pound-for-pound boxer in the world. The trouble started when Mayweather’s camp publicly accused Pacquiao of doping his way to the top of the boxing ranks by using steroids. Mayweather’s camp then insisted that both fighters undergo random Olympic style blood testing as a requirement leading up to the bout. Pacquaio and his handlers declined, but said they would be willing to except a less stringent process of blood testing. To date with only two months left before the scheduled fight there is still no agreement in place. Fans and members from both camps have been endlessly accusing the other side of cowering and ruining the dream match. Subsequently, Pacquaio has filed a law suit against Mayweather Jr. and Golden Boy Production for defiling is reputation, and Bob Arum, Pacquiao’s promoter, is supposedly involved in new negotiations to find Pacman an alternative opponent to fight this coming March.

If there is anyone in doubt that this fight will take place, don’t be. Despite the power tripping on both sides of the fence, and threats of lawsuits, these two fighters need each other for $200,000,000 reasons. That is my estimated sum that a showdown between these two fighters would generate. Neither Bob Arum nor Golden Boy Productions is going to be able to garner that amount of money pairing any other two fighters in the ring. They know it, I know it, and so does anyone that knows anything about boxing.

Secondly, Pacquaio has eluded that he will end his boxing career after his next match. If he fights anyone other than Mayweather, it will be a very lack luster and unmemorable finish. Although he will still leave an impressionable mark on boxing history, the question of was he the best pound-for-pound boxer of all-time will loom over him like a reoccurring nightmare.

Last, neither Mayweather nor Pacquaio has said that they aren’t willing to fight the other for the keys to throne. So I expect a public announcement will be made any day saying that the two sides have reached an agreement, and then the entire boxing world can simultaneously sigh in relief.

Failure Doesn't Have to be Your Fault

Choosing the Right Health Club for Failure

Losing weight can be a daunting task for many people, so why not put a positive spin on your setbacks by choosing a health club that legitimizes your excuses for not working out. Here are a few tips:

1. First, find a gym that is inconveniently located miles away from where you work or live. Now you have plenty of reasons not to go.

2. On the occasions you do go to the gym make sure the experience is unpleasant. Try finding a club that has creepy sex-starved voyagers lingering in and around the changing room areas, and hairy chest overweight men in Speedos taking hot-yoga classes.

3. The machines in the cardio area should be packed in tight. This way you will be sure to get a good dousing of foreign sweat flying off the body of the person running on the neighboring treadmill beside you.

4. Parking should be expensive and or difficult to find, and also cause you to have to walk a great distance to and from your vehicle.

5. Avoid any club where the staff is helpful, they may sabotage your master plan of excusing your mediocrity by providing unwanted motivation and encouragement. It’s important to stay focused on the road to failure. Distance yourself from positive influences.

6. A gym that is not well kept is perfect for picking up gym cooties. This could potentially lead to an illness requiring long-term doctor’s care and avoidance of the gym all together.

7. Safety is always an issue. So the gym should be located in a bad part of town. This leaves you only the weekends to workout. Because you are at work during the day, and it wouldn’t be wise to go to the gym at night when there is an increase in vice activities in the neighborhood surrounding the gym.

These helpful tips should successfully allow you to place your failed New Year's resolution of losing weight onto the shoulders of the gym you joined. After all, you gave it the college try; things just didn’t work-out.

My New Year's Resolutions

In 2010

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I cannot accept, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I have to kill this year because they pissed me off.

And also, help me to be careful of the toes I step on in the coming months as they may be connected to the ass that I may have to kiss in the later months.


Help me to always give 100% at work…


12% on Monday
23% on Tuesday
40% on Wednesday
20% on Thursday
5% on Friday

And help me to remember…
When I’m having a really bad day, and it seems that people are trying to piss me off, that it takes 42 muscles to frown and only 4 to extend my middle finger and tell them to fu#k off!

Amen